So I've come to the realization a lot of things happen that I have absolutely no idea why they happen...I focus too much on these things and over-think the whys of them all. It occurred to me earlier today that I have absolutely no control over any of these things. So with that being said, I shouldn't focus so much on why these things happen...I should focus on learning from them and becoming a stronger, better person. We all get to certain areas in our lives by the decisions we make...yes, God has our lives planned long before we are born, but we ultimately make the decisions that put us where we are in life. I used to pride myself on making the right decisions to put me where I am in life...yet, I continually find myself in difficult situations wondering how I got here. This, in the end, resulted from me making the wrong decisions in the wrong situations. But instead of kicking myself for making the wrong decisions, I've decided to focus on how I can learn from my mistakes and make the right decisions the next time. My biggest mistake, and not that it's a mistake, is that I trust too easily...I've been burned so many times b/c of this trust, yet I continue to trust people. This ultimately leads to people taking advantage of that trust. One of my friends told me today that I'm a nice person who believes the best in people...I politely told him that was a nice way of saying I'm naive. Sadly, I think he was right. I never thought I was naive, but looking back on certain situations, I realized I kind of am. I do believe the best in people...I believe people are ultimately good in nature. Yet the majority of the time, people are not good...I wouldn't have a job if that weren't the case. Yet I somehow manage to find the bad in most people I run across.
So the lesson learned from this whole experience is that I'll trust people but I won't put my full heart in it until I am certain the trust is there. But the second lesson I learned is that if you don't risk your heart and trust in love, then you'll live your life alone. Each experience I've lived through has taught me what I want in a relationship and a man, as well as what I don't want. So I've learned a lot...I've made a lot of decisions that haven't turned out to be the right ones. But they've led me to where I am in life...and I have an amazing life. There's no doubt about that.
So with that being said, I'll take my lessons learned from this experience and become a stronger woman. I'll stop over-analyzing every situation and I'll just live my life...I'll have fun and make the right decisions for me, not for anyone else. I'm ready to live life and put my best foot forward in every situation :) I'm ready to fall in love with life again! It's about time I do :)
Quote of the day ~ "You only live once, but if you work it right, once is enough."
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
It's been awhile...
So the last time I posted was in September, which seems like a lifetime ago. I'll just start from there and catch up to today. I ended up straining my knee, so I was unable to run the last 26 mile training run. However, I did run the marathon on October 31st. It was amazing...my official time was 5:30:27. I wanted to run it in 5 hours, but I'm happy I was able to complete it...I was always told I wouldn't be able to b/c of my knee problems and my asthma. So I proved everyone wrong, including myself. I didn't know if I wanted to run another one, but now I'm itching for another one...I won't be able to run one this year, but I will next year....I plan on running another one and beating my previous time.
The interesting part of the marathon was that I got on a plane the next day for a 6 month deployment to Kuwait. I had two weeks notice I was going, although I volunteered to go. So before I knew it, I was in another country across the world. It was an amazing experience. I learned a lot about myself and my job and had a great time. I was in the office I worked for by myself for the first 3.5 months...at first, I was incredibly overwhelmed, but after a couple weeks, I realized I was able to do what I needed to do while getting everything done in a timely manner.
In January 2011, I came home on R&R b/c my lil Raf was doing very poorly. He had been in the emergency vet three times since Christmas and was progressively getting worse. When I got home, I knew he wasn't the same dog...he gave me lots of lovin' but he could hardly stand on his own, let alone walk or go up and down stairs. He was a fighter, and I knew he would've kept fighting...but it was his time. He deserved to be in a better place. It was the hardest decision I ever had to make, but I'm glad he's no longer in pain. We got the results back from his biopsy and he did have Pug Dog Encephalitis...it was labeled "very severe." So it was definitely progressively getting worse.
I was back in Kuwait in February and the rest of the time flew by. Before I knew it, I was in April and my tour was coming to an end. It was weird b/c I still felt like I'd just gotten there. But May 1st finally arrived and I was on a plane back home. So six months of my life was spent in Kuwait...but it was a great experience and a huge learning experience. So now I'm back to work and back in VA. And that catches me up :)
I'll tell you what though...getting back into the every day groove has been interesting. I had such a demanding schedule in Kuwait, but it was also ever-changing, so it was a go-with-the-flow type of thing. My schedule here is a little different...for the most part, I can plan everything out a few days in advance. But I still haven't found my groove yet...I suppose it will take a little time. I've only been home for 3 weeks, so I'll be patient and just go forward with each day. What else can I do, right? :)
But life is good....I've made some life-changing decisions and am in a much better place now than I was before I left. I know who I am and what I want in life...and most importantly, I know what I have to do to get it. So watch out b/c here I am :)
Quote of the day ~ "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."
The interesting part of the marathon was that I got on a plane the next day for a 6 month deployment to Kuwait. I had two weeks notice I was going, although I volunteered to go. So before I knew it, I was in another country across the world. It was an amazing experience. I learned a lot about myself and my job and had a great time. I was in the office I worked for by myself for the first 3.5 months...at first, I was incredibly overwhelmed, but after a couple weeks, I realized I was able to do what I needed to do while getting everything done in a timely manner.
In January 2011, I came home on R&R b/c my lil Raf was doing very poorly. He had been in the emergency vet three times since Christmas and was progressively getting worse. When I got home, I knew he wasn't the same dog...he gave me lots of lovin' but he could hardly stand on his own, let alone walk or go up and down stairs. He was a fighter, and I knew he would've kept fighting...but it was his time. He deserved to be in a better place. It was the hardest decision I ever had to make, but I'm glad he's no longer in pain. We got the results back from his biopsy and he did have Pug Dog Encephalitis...it was labeled "very severe." So it was definitely progressively getting worse.
I was back in Kuwait in February and the rest of the time flew by. Before I knew it, I was in April and my tour was coming to an end. It was weird b/c I still felt like I'd just gotten there. But May 1st finally arrived and I was on a plane back home. So six months of my life was spent in Kuwait...but it was a great experience and a huge learning experience. So now I'm back to work and back in VA. And that catches me up :)
I'll tell you what though...getting back into the every day groove has been interesting. I had such a demanding schedule in Kuwait, but it was also ever-changing, so it was a go-with-the-flow type of thing. My schedule here is a little different...for the most part, I can plan everything out a few days in advance. But I still haven't found my groove yet...I suppose it will take a little time. I've only been home for 3 weeks, so I'll be patient and just go forward with each day. What else can I do, right? :)
But life is good....I've made some life-changing decisions and am in a much better place now than I was before I left. I know who I am and what I want in life...and most importantly, I know what I have to do to get it. So watch out b/c here I am :)
Quote of the day ~ "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
23 miles...done and done
So I finished all 23 miles...at an 11:30 per mile pace. Wow. That's really all I have to say. I can't believe my body carried me for 4 hours, 26 minutes, and 45 seconds over the full 23 miles (well, according to my Garmin, it was 23.18 miles or so, but who's counting??). I was in A LOT of pain (my poor legs didn't want to move forward), but I finished it all. I don't know if it was just a bad running day, or if my legs were telling me something I didn't want to hear, but I put one foot in front of the other and I finished the whole thing. God Bless my running group for keeping my spirits up and helping me finish strong, because without them, I seriously don't think I would have finished. It was sheer willpower and the great teamwork of my group that kept me moving forward. I'm hoping the 26 miles isn't that bad...I've been having a pain in the bottom of my left foot (right in the ball of my foot), so I've been experimenting with insoles for my shoes hoping to make it go away. I got some gel insoles the other day and I had no pain during my hour long run today. I think the true test will be on Friday for my 10 mile run.
So anyways - back to the 23. I got home and immediately climbed into an ice bath. I was freezing, but I think it helped way more than regular icing. I then used my foam roller to pretty much roll every muscle in my legs. I was having a severe pain in my left hip...I'm not sure what it was from b/c I didn't do anything to it during the run, but I was limping from the pain. So I rolled the crap outta of it and lo and behold, I felt MUCH better the next day. The human body does strange things, huh? I guess I should expect it considering I am running a marathon, LOL. Talk about doing strange things to one's body, LOL.
Anyways - I have two short run weeks, then the 26 miles, then three short run weeks, then the marathon. Holy cow...it's coming up quicker than I thought it would!!! And I'm actually doing it!!! SCARY :P Keep my crazy self in your thoughts and prayers and hope it carries me through...along with my poor legs :)
Quote of the day ~ "I don't necessarily agree with everything I say."
So anyways - back to the 23. I got home and immediately climbed into an ice bath. I was freezing, but I think it helped way more than regular icing. I then used my foam roller to pretty much roll every muscle in my legs. I was having a severe pain in my left hip...I'm not sure what it was from b/c I didn't do anything to it during the run, but I was limping from the pain. So I rolled the crap outta of it and lo and behold, I felt MUCH better the next day. The human body does strange things, huh? I guess I should expect it considering I am running a marathon, LOL. Talk about doing strange things to one's body, LOL.
Anyways - I have two short run weeks, then the 26 miles, then three short run weeks, then the marathon. Holy cow...it's coming up quicker than I thought it would!!! And I'm actually doing it!!! SCARY :P Keep my crazy self in your thoughts and prayers and hope it carries me through...along with my poor legs :)
Quote of the day ~ "I don't necessarily agree with everything I say."
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
20 miles...I did it!!!
So I ran the 20 miles...all of it :) It took us 4:03:52 to finish...it was humid, but overcast, and breathing was rough, but I did it all! We run 3 minutes, walk 1 minute, and I got through the entire run thinking, "All you have to do is run 3 minutes, then you can walk 1." There were really hard 3 minute segments and there were really easy ones...but I did it! I was congested, spitting up phlegm (gross, I know), and my nose was a runny mess, but I dragged my sorry butt out there and did it! I didn't want to end up running on my own or missing one of our last long runs...so there ya have it :) If I can run 20 miles with a nasty head/chest cold and congestion, then I can totally do the full marathon healthy :) Woo hoo!! Now two short weeks and then our 23 mile run :) I'm getting closer and closer to the finish line! And I can't wait!
Sunday, August 15, 2010
20 miles...it's go time...
So this Saturday is our 20 mile run...I'm kinda scared of how I'm going to feel during it, b/c I really haven't been running the past two weeks. I took the first week off b/c I was having major knee pain, so I rested and iced and didn't run at all from Saturday to Saturday. I ended up running that Saturday, but it was a 6-mile run. I felt great...then along comes Monday and I was sick as a dog, and I didn't run at all for the entire week b/c I couldn't breath and my head hurt, etc., etc. Being sick is NO fun...then I ran the Run Amuck on Saturday with my wifey, but it was a 3.5 mile run and full of obstacles. So I have to get back into my runs this week...at least 2 one-hour runs, then Saturday is our 20 miles. I'm actually really scared of how I'm going to react...of whether I'll be able to hold my own and last the full mileage. I felt great the two Saturday runs, but short runs are definitely way different than the long runs. Thank goodness for group runs and people who will keep me motivated and moving forward through the run. So we'll see how I fare on Saturday...
On another note, I can't believe we're already half-way through August. I honestly have no idea where the time has gone...this pretty much means there's 2 1/2 months until the marathon. We have three long runs left, I have a 1/2 marathon and the Army Ten Miler, then it's time for the marathon. That's kinda like whoa...who would've thought it'd be here so quickly?? Wasn't it just May? If I can make it through the last 3 long training runs, then I should be golden for the marathon :) I have plenty of support from my family and friends, and I have a great running partner...his wife and friends will be meeting us at certain points during the race to provide water and food and anything else we may need. The next thing I think I need, though, is new shoes...I love the running shoes I have, but only for short distances. For the 17 mile run, my feet were KILLING me...I need better shoes for those long distances!! That's for sure...but I won't get them this week...it'd be silly to get them for my first long run now, LOL.
Anyways - I'm off to bed...tomorrow starts another long week. Yay for Mondays :) Everyone enjoy it!
Quote of the day ~ "Don't go through life, GROW through life."
On another note, I can't believe we're already half-way through August. I honestly have no idea where the time has gone...this pretty much means there's 2 1/2 months until the marathon. We have three long runs left, I have a 1/2 marathon and the Army Ten Miler, then it's time for the marathon. That's kinda like whoa...who would've thought it'd be here so quickly?? Wasn't it just May? If I can make it through the last 3 long training runs, then I should be golden for the marathon :) I have plenty of support from my family and friends, and I have a great running partner...his wife and friends will be meeting us at certain points during the race to provide water and food and anything else we may need. The next thing I think I need, though, is new shoes...I love the running shoes I have, but only for short distances. For the 17 mile run, my feet were KILLING me...I need better shoes for those long distances!! That's for sure...but I won't get them this week...it'd be silly to get them for my first long run now, LOL.
Anyways - I'm off to bed...tomorrow starts another long week. Yay for Mondays :) Everyone enjoy it!
Quote of the day ~ "Don't go through life, GROW through life."
Thursday, July 29, 2010
17 miles...oh my!
So 17 miles...yup...I ran it...this morning. It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, but it was 17 miles, LOL. It wasn't as hot as it has been, but it definitely was still humid. I was dripping with sweat within the first mile. It didn't help I found every spider web on the trail...I spent that first mile getting the webs off my arms, my face, my legs, and my hat. It was DISGUSTING. I felt so creepy crawly until finally we were through the worst part of the trail and I was sweaty, so it didn't matter anymore, LOL. Gross, but true :P
Overall, it was a great run. I was properly hydrated (yay!!!), I had plenty to eat before, during and after the run, and I used body glide so I didn't chafe! Woo hoo :) My legs are sore, and I've been hungry all day, but that's kinda what happens when you run 17 miles, right? But I'm getting more confident in that I can complete the long runs with strength and stamina. We have two weeks of short runs (one is a fun run with my wifey, yay!), then our 20 mile run. Not only are we on double digits, but it's in the 20s! Oh boy. I hope I don't get overwhelmed by the number, but it's only 3 miles more than today :) I can do it! Yay!!
Here's to getting ready for the marathon...conquering all my fears and realizing I can overcome my athletic-induced asthma and my knee problems. I feel amazing that I'm able to do this :) My body has carried me this far...only 9 miles more til I hit the full marathon :) :) :)
Quote of the day ~ Everything happens for a reason!
Overall, it was a great run. I was properly hydrated (yay!!!), I had plenty to eat before, during and after the run, and I used body glide so I didn't chafe! Woo hoo :) My legs are sore, and I've been hungry all day, but that's kinda what happens when you run 17 miles, right? But I'm getting more confident in that I can complete the long runs with strength and stamina. We have two weeks of short runs (one is a fun run with my wifey, yay!), then our 20 mile run. Not only are we on double digits, but it's in the 20s! Oh boy. I hope I don't get overwhelmed by the number, but it's only 3 miles more than today :) I can do it! Yay!!
Here's to getting ready for the marathon...conquering all my fears and realizing I can overcome my athletic-induced asthma and my knee problems. I feel amazing that I'm able to do this :) My body has carried me this far...only 9 miles more til I hit the full marathon :) :) :)
Quote of the day ~ Everything happens for a reason!
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Half Marathon
So 11 weeks into training and yesterday was our half-marathon distance...13 miles. I knew it was going to be rough only b/c I went to Hershey Park on Thursday. I (silly me) didn't drink enough water throughout the day and was sweating like crazy...well, lo and behold, I got really nauseous and totally out of it. Yup, I got dehydrated (me, the water drinker...the "I have to pee" girl). So I spent Thursday night and Friday all day drinking as much water and electrolyte drinks as I could possibly stand, but I still knew my muscles would be sore come Saturday morning's run.
So along comes Saturday morning...the run starts at 6 a.m., which of course, means I have to wake up even earlier to take care of the mutts. And I see it's raining, or has been, so I check my email over and over to see if the run was canceled...b/c for the life of me, all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed. But alas, the run wasn't canceled, so I dragged my sorry butt to Arlington to run 13 miles...as soon as I parked in the lot, the sky opened. The rain was coming down so hard, it was a joke...the second I stepped out of my car, I was soaked. I knew it was going to be a pleasant run (note the sarcasm). I was surprised at how many people were actually there...we definitely are die-hard runners. So, of course, I sit in my car until the last minute hoping the rain would let up even the slightest bit. So I didn't stretch at all (mistake number 1). We get into our groups and start out a little after 6...there are 6 people in our group, much less than normal, and most of us are still dead tired and now soaking wet. So needless to say, we're all a little quiet as we start out. The plan was to run out 3 miles, then back 3 miles to the "halfway" point where there was a bathroom and an "aid" station with water, gatorade, and little treats. Let's just say I thought I was going to die the first 6 miles...my legs hurt, the rain was miserable, and the hills were killing me.
On to the first break...thank GOD for the first break. I had some water and a couple little treats, which really saved me...I also stretched my legs, which totally saved me! I don't think I could have finished without the stretching. We then ran out 3.5 miles the other way and 3.5 back. That 7 miles was MUCH quicker than the first 6. I was more lively, felt better, and actually WANTED to be running. It certainly is mind over matter when it comes to running long distances...not every run is going to be fun, nor are you going to want to run every long run. But you psych yourself out and you get it done...b/c after finishing the 13 miles, I realized I had no idea how I got there. I truly have no idea how I pushed my body to run the 13 miles. I was sore when it was over, but I stretched and iced, and I feel MUCH better today. Thank god for a group to run with, b/c there's a large possibility I wouldn't have made it through without them.
So next Saturday is 15 miles...I'm hoping it isn't raining and I'm hoping I stay fairly well hydrated throughout the week. This week will be a combination of staying hydrated, stretching, icing, and making sure I can get through this long run without being a total grouch, LOL. 15 miles will be the longest I've ever run, so it will be a true test for me...one more step to the full 26.2 :)
So here it is Sunday after a long run...and I feel great. I slept in for the first time in ages, and my legs aren't sore...it's great :) Let's hope I can keep it up over the next few weeks of training. 26.2 miles is a long way...but I'm moving in the right direction to being able to finish strongly :) October 31st...wooo buddy...it'll be here in a blink of an eye!
Quote of the day ~ "When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice." (This is so true!! Hahahaha)
So along comes Saturday morning...the run starts at 6 a.m., which of course, means I have to wake up even earlier to take care of the mutts. And I see it's raining, or has been, so I check my email over and over to see if the run was canceled...b/c for the life of me, all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed. But alas, the run wasn't canceled, so I dragged my sorry butt to Arlington to run 13 miles...as soon as I parked in the lot, the sky opened. The rain was coming down so hard, it was a joke...the second I stepped out of my car, I was soaked. I knew it was going to be a pleasant run (note the sarcasm). I was surprised at how many people were actually there...we definitely are die-hard runners. So, of course, I sit in my car until the last minute hoping the rain would let up even the slightest bit. So I didn't stretch at all (mistake number 1). We get into our groups and start out a little after 6...there are 6 people in our group, much less than normal, and most of us are still dead tired and now soaking wet. So needless to say, we're all a little quiet as we start out. The plan was to run out 3 miles, then back 3 miles to the "halfway" point where there was a bathroom and an "aid" station with water, gatorade, and little treats. Let's just say I thought I was going to die the first 6 miles...my legs hurt, the rain was miserable, and the hills were killing me.
On to the first break...thank GOD for the first break. I had some water and a couple little treats, which really saved me...I also stretched my legs, which totally saved me! I don't think I could have finished without the stretching. We then ran out 3.5 miles the other way and 3.5 back. That 7 miles was MUCH quicker than the first 6. I was more lively, felt better, and actually WANTED to be running. It certainly is mind over matter when it comes to running long distances...not every run is going to be fun, nor are you going to want to run every long run. But you psych yourself out and you get it done...b/c after finishing the 13 miles, I realized I had no idea how I got there. I truly have no idea how I pushed my body to run the 13 miles. I was sore when it was over, but I stretched and iced, and I feel MUCH better today. Thank god for a group to run with, b/c there's a large possibility I wouldn't have made it through without them.
So next Saturday is 15 miles...I'm hoping it isn't raining and I'm hoping I stay fairly well hydrated throughout the week. This week will be a combination of staying hydrated, stretching, icing, and making sure I can get through this long run without being a total grouch, LOL. 15 miles will be the longest I've ever run, so it will be a true test for me...one more step to the full 26.2 :)
So here it is Sunday after a long run...and I feel great. I slept in for the first time in ages, and my legs aren't sore...it's great :) Let's hope I can keep it up over the next few weeks of training. 26.2 miles is a long way...but I'm moving in the right direction to being able to finish strongly :) October 31st...wooo buddy...it'll be here in a blink of an eye!
Quote of the day ~ "When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice." (This is so true!! Hahahaha)
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)